Low self esteem:
Low self worth/esteem manifests in many ways and is probably an issue for you if you:
• have trouble standing up for your needs or have trouble saying no
• have an intensely negative self judge or inner critic
• feel insecure in public
• feel unlovable
• are treated poorly in your relationships
• doubt yourself or put yourself down
• feel undeserving
Self esteem is equivalent to the foundation of a building — it’s the structure that your sense of self is built on. Without that strong foundation you are likely to feel insecure, disempowered and incapable of managing life, and in the face of adversity you are more likely to collapse into paralysis.
Through the lens of low self esteem every setback, such as the loss of a job or relationship, seems to confirm that there is something wrong with you. This undermines your self confidence, leading to a tentative approach to relationships, work and other activities that fuels a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure.
One of the hallmarks of low self worth is a tendency towards negative or critical thinking about oneself. I refer to the part of yourself that puts yourself down and makes you feel small as the “self judge” or “inner critic”. This voice often reflects messages or reflections you received from people growing up, but at some point along the line you came to believe those negative messages and a part of you developed that continues to tell you those negative things about yourself today.
Feelings of low self worth can be so deeply entrenched that you may feel nothing can be done about them, but I find that most people actually experience significant shifts in a relatively small number of sessions of Coherence Therapy. As you regain a fundamental sense of worth you will begin to recognize that the obstacles that arise in the course of life are nothing more than challenging situations that need to be navigated. As you stop worrying about whether you are ok or what every setback means about you, you will be able to focus more of your energy on overcoming obstacles and achieving your goals.
If these symptoms resonate with you and you’d like an opportunity to feel better about yourself, I invite you to give it a try and schedule a free initial consultation.